I am a democrat only on principle, not by instinct, nobody is that. Doubtless some people say they are, but this world is grievously given to lying.
Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, humorist
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"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
Humorous"The ass is the only animal that can't be improved by cross-breeding."
Controversial"I have found that the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it."
Strange & Unusual"The human being is a machine. An automatic machine. It does not reason. It merely acts upon the impulse of the moment."
Strange & Unusual"The report of my death was an exaggeration."
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