"God gave man a penis and a brain, but not enough blood to send to both at the same time."

"The only thing that's worse than being alone is being with someone who makes you feel alone."

"If women ran the world, there would be no wars, just a bunch of angry countries not talking to each other."

"Being a woman is very difficult, since it consists principally of dealing with men."

"I'm a big believer in the power of positive thinking."