"The motif is secondary; what I want to capture is what there is between the motif and myself."

"I am in despair. I am working like a madman, but I am not making any progress."

"How I dream of Giverny in this lovely weather and envy you for being there, you have no idea. But I am a prisoner and must see it through, despite being completely drained. It's exhausting and I'm wor…"

"I am chasing the merest sliver of color. It is my own fault, I want to grasp the intangible."

"I'm absolutely disgusted with myself. I'm a failure."