"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it."

"All sects are different, because they come from men; morality is everywhere the same, because it comes from God."

"The first step, my son, which one takes in the world, is to make oneself necessary."

"He who is not a little mad, has no wisdom."

"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."