George Bernard Shaw

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

Science is always wrong. It never solves a problem without creating ten more.

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel.

Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.

An asylum for the sane would be itself insane.

The camera can photograph thought.

Life on a farm is a school of patience; you can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two years; very well, I can't hurry my vocabulary.

Nothing is ever accomplished in any field of human endeavor without enthusiasm.

The love of the family, the love of one person can destroy the world.

On his deathbed, Shaw's last words were reportedly: 'I'm all right now, thank you.' (though debated, often cited as witty remark)

Without art, the crudeness of reality would make the world unbearable.