Richard Pryor

(Pryor to his woman) 'I'm gonna find me some new pussy!' (Imitating the woman) 'Yeah? You had two more inches of dick you'd find some new pussy here!' 'I know the dick was good to you. If it wasn't good why was you hollerin'?' 'I was hollerin' to keep from laughin' in your face...'

It starts out as a way to entertain yourself. And then the drugs take you over, the drugs live your life.

I didn't believe I was in the hospital. This doctor kept asking me, 'Do you know who I am?' And I kept wondering, 'Why is he asking me this?' I thought all these people were trying to kill me.

I'm for human lib, the liberation of all people, not just black people or female people or gay people.

The black groups that boycott certain films would do better to get the money together to make the films they want to see, or stay in church and leave us to our work.

I ain't no movie star, man. I'm a booty star.

If I ain't horny, I check to see if my heart's beatin'.

But the material was deemed too controversial — one sketch had Pryor totally nude but with his genitalia blacked out — and the series was cancelled after just four episodes.

I ain't for no. you know what I mean i ain't into that i ain't nothing ain't no faggot in me. but I'm not a faggot i want to suck your blood. and you want to suck my blood. i know what you want to suck motherfucker but I don't play that really now get your head off me motherfucker. you don't be touching. me you understand cuz I kick your ass.

When you're getting your ass kicked, you don't stop and say, 'Hold on, I think you're violating my constitutional rights.'

White folks can't call black folks niggers anymore. So now they call us 'you people.'

I went to Africa. 'Cause I wanted to find out where I came from. And you know what I found out? I'm from a long line of slaves. I didn't find no kings and queens. I found a bunch of people living in huts with no doors. And I said, 'No wonder y'all got took. Y'all didn't even have no doors!'

The only time you hear the word 'nigger' is when a black man says it to another black man. That's the only time you hear it. White folks don't even say it no more. They say 'you people.'

I had a dog named Nigger. I loved that dog. I just didn't like the word. I loved the dog. I loved him so much I named him after the last thing my daddy told me before he left: 'Nigger, if you don't get your ass in this house...'

Jail ain't so bad. You can make it in jail. It's like being in the Army, but the people in jail shot back.

When I was in Africa, the very first day I was there, I saw a Tarzan movie. I said, 'Oh shit, this is where they make those movies.' I saw this white dude swinging through the jungle, hollering, 'Aaaahhhh-ahhhh!' I said, 'Damn, that's some racist shit.'

I always wondered why white folks got a KKK and black folks got the NAACP. I said, 'Shit, we need a KKK. Kill, Kill, Kill!'

I was in the joint for eleven days. Eleven days in the joint. I went in there a negro, I come out a nigger.

I don't think white people realize how racist they are. For instance, you ever notice how they look at you when you're in a white neighborhood? They look at you like you're lost. And you look at them like they're lost. Because they are.

They always say the black man has a hard-on in the courtroom. That's why they always say, 'All rise.'