"I'm not a fan of modern anything. I think it's all just a bunch of people who are trying to be new, but they're just repeating the same old mistakes."

"I have a lot of problems with 'the system.' But you know what I do when I encounter a system I can't handle? I don't try to change it. I don't complain about it. I just find a way to get around it."

"Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck."

"I don’t like to think of laws as rules you have to follow, but more as suggestions."

"The government is lying to you. They always have been. They always will be. And you're still falling for it."