"I'd convinced myself that there was no point in even trying, because I was just going to fail, like I had at school, at work, and at everything else I'd ever tried. 'You ain't no good as a singer,' I …"

"To be a liar, you've got to have a great memory, and I don't have a memory."

"I've never been a fan of exercise. I'd rather just sit on my arse and watch TV."

"I'm not a very good cook. I can burn water."

"I don't understand computers. I don't understand the internet. I just want to rock and roll."