Tiny Tim — "I'm a romantic at heart. I believe in true love."

"I'm a very unique person. There's nobody like me."

"I have pure thoughts. Even right now I will tell you that I just met on July 28th, at the Great American Music Hall in San Francisco, this lovely girl, Miss Eva. She is only fifteen and I talk to her …"

"Ah, romance ... a wonderful thing that is spoiled by bad breath and body odors."

"I'm not kidding. anyone i can't describe what the Dodgers. and Leafs have meant to me in sports. i mean it's not only on the field. where it's important well even on the stage."

"He used only Bounty Microwave or Job Squad disposable paper towels after his baths. Thought any cloth towel was a bit suspect."