"It is discouraging to try to penetrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it thoroughly fumigated, and then put in a new lot of furniture."

"If you don't read a newspaper, you are uninformed. If you do read it, you are misinformed."

"The very first thing which a man has to do, in order to learn how to do a thing, is to learn how to unlearn it."

"All good things arrive unto them that wait and don't die in the meantime."

"The finest clothing made is a man's own skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this."