George Carlin — "Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger …"
Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by tying biscuits all over your body.
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More from George Carlin
"I'm not a genius. I'm just a guy who's smart enough to know what he doesn't know."
"The only good thing about the good old days is that they're gone."
"Feminists say that men are a bunch of pigs. Well, I don't know about that, but I do know that pigs are pretty smart animals. So, maybe that's a compliment?"
"I'm a little freaked out by the number of people who don't seem to notice the difference between 'you're' and 'your.' It's like, there's a huge difference, people!"
"I'm not a pessimist. I'm a realist. I just happen to believe that reality is a dark, depressing, and ultimately meaningless place."