George Carlin — "If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom figh…"
If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
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More from George Carlin
"I'm a little freaked out by the number of people who don't seem to notice the difference between 'you're' and 'your.' It's like, there's a huge difference, people!"
"I'm not a role model. I'm just a guy who tries to make people laugh."
"I have a lot of anger. I have a lot of rage. I have a lot of resentment. And I use it. I use it in my comedy. I use it in my writing. I use it in my life."
"I'm not a paranoid, but I feel like I'm being watched. And I'm not a narcissist, but I feel like I'm being judged. And I'm not a hypochondriac, but I feel like I'm dying."
"If you're looking for sympathy you'll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary."