Martin Luther — "A happy fart never comes from a miserable ass."

"I am drinking beer from Namburg which tastes to me almost like the beer from Mansfeld which you praised to me. It agrees with me well and gives me about three bowel movements in three hours in the mor…"

"I am a peasant's son; my father, grandfather, and great-grandfather were genuine peasants."

"Our Lord has written the promise of the resurrection, not in books alone, but in every leaf in springtime."

"It is not the business of the government to preach the gospel."

"I am afraid that the schools will prove the very gates of hell, unless they diligently labor in explaining the Holy Scriptures and engraving them in the heart of the youth."